Every feel like escaping that cage, but your low self esteem and confidence keeps holding you back? Follow these easy steps that will allow you to break free and be your true self.
Step One: Figuring out who you truly are.
Going into highschool or college, teachers try to convince us to come out of our shells and express ourselves. Some people are naturally loud and others quiet. But what if you are that quiet one that wants to be loud and heard? It’s one thing to be a quiet person and another to be someone that’s holding themselves back. So the question is, what is holding YOU back?
Many times people experience low self esteem or low self confidence due to past incidents. The good news is that it doesn’t stop there. Think of our mind and emotions as if it was our physical body. If we don’t work on our body, provide it with the right nutrients and workouts, it won’t grow stronger. The same concept follows for our mind and emotions. If we don’t provide our thoughts with the positive aspects that we need, how will our minds grow stronger?
To every problem, there is a solution. One way to start cracking your own secrets is by keeping a journal. Everyday write down what bugged you that day, what caught your attention, what made you laugh? The more specific you are, the sooner you’ll realize what you value and what not.
Step Two: Exceeding Your Comfort Zone.
Oh yes, it’s time to leave your sanctuary and discover what’s out there. Leaving your comfort zone is not an easy thing to do; it’s like asking you to pour the milk before the cereal when you normally put the cereal before the milk. This fear that comes with leaving our comfort zone causes stress and anxiety, perhaps fearing what others might think. Why do their thoughts matter? People usually ask, “What makes you so different from so so?,” when the question should really be, “ Why would you want to be the same as so so?” Each and everyone of us is unique, which is why we were born. To get even more information on breaking out of your comfort zone, just check out Alan Henry and his article The Science of Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone (And Why You Should).
Step Three: Be Optimistic rather than Pessimistic/Realistic.
Do you ever catch yourself complaining to yourself after you’ve made a mistake? “Gosh I am so stupid. Ugh, why did I do that?! I can’t believe that just happen.” It’s normal reaction, however you shouldn’t beat yourself up for every time you make a mistake. Not even machines are perfect, so surely humans are allowed to make mistakes; besides, that’s how we learn right? So here’s another helpful task. Every morning, write down three things that you are grateful for; and if you can’t find something, look for it. Remember, write everything in detail; why are you grateful for that thing or person or idea? Soon, you’ll start viewing things in a more positive manner.
Step Four: Become Active
Did you know that our body produces its own type of happy drug? It’s called endorphins. What’s great about this beautiful natural chemical is that it literally does make you feel happy. When you exercise, your body produces these hormones, allowing you to feel excited and to ignore any type of pain. As a soccer player, I constantly work out and run. However, at this point, I do it for the feeling I get afterwards, the feeling of satisfaction and joyfulness brought by the endorphins.
Your constant feeling of happiness will affect the way you think, allowing you to be more positive (remember step 3? ) and you’ll be more content at trying new things ( step 2: exceeding your comfort zone).
Step Five: Make-Over
A wise person once said, “When you look good, you feel good.” Surely it doesn’t matter what others think, but is it nice to know when someone acknowledges your new shoes or hair style, or even your new blouse. Proper grooming is a huge step in building your self confidence. You’ll notice right away that your self esteem raises when you know you look hot and that you ARE hot. And there’s nothing more attractive than a person who know’s they’re sexy.
Step Six: Time to De-Stress.
Stop worrying about everything little thing and just let life take control. We tend to stress over the silliest things, and sometimes even things that haven’t even happened! Relax, take a breather, everything will be okay. I guarantee you’ll be able to solve your problem more accurately while you are calm rather than stressed, for when you are stressed, you tend to follow the first idea that comes to mind. Lets face it, sometimes plan B works way better than plan A. Therefore I have one more task for you. If you can’t get the time to do some yoga, try some simple stretches. I promise it’ll be worth waking up half an hour before the usually time. Do a couple of simple stretches that stretch every part of your body when you wake up. And for when you go to sleep, try a muscle relaxing exercise:
Lay completely flat on your back (doesn’t matter where).
Begin with your fingers. Flex them for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
Flex your forearms for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
Flex your upper arms for 3-5 seconds, then relax
Flex your upper torso and abdominals for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
Flex your buttocks for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
Flex your thighs for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
Flex your calves for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
And finally flex your feet for 3-5 seconds, then relax.
You will be amazed at how relaxed you’ll feel and how quickly you will fall asleep.